“Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.”~Earl Nightingale
So I have always known how important it is to take time for yourself as a parent, and as a person in general. Life gets busy, things get in the way, but even small things can make a big impact in a good way on our well being. There are always going to be things you want to do more of but when you can’t make the bigger things happen find some time to take a few minutes out of the day for yourself.
With the kids back to school I am finding more time in some of my days and among other reasons too I’ve felt a little lost when they are gone during the day(anyone else experience this??) So I have been reflecting and doing things on my own more that I haven’t in years or never have done by myself. It is strange for me because I now have some time to actually give this thought (weird right?!? extra time for yourself as a mom?!? never could I ever seen that one coming at least not for like 10 more years!?!). Don’t get me wrong in a way it is pretty nice and comes in good timing after a weekend of work I can find a little time to relax and catch up on things but then in a way its just really hard like the reality of my kiddos growing up smacking me in the face. So my point is at this time I am realizing I have a little more time to do stuff for myself that in the past I haven’t had time for. I started to really think how can I use this time wisely. What are things that I like to do aside from planning activities to do with the kids? I need to use this time to grow personally and not just continue on in this repeat mode I have been on over the years. I have the gym which is my go to thing and top favorite and something I usually could not find enough time for, I pick up a book occasionally…. I clean, cook and do the laundry….all the normal to do’s with house, family, and pets 😊 ….I enjoy catching up with family and friends when time permits but let’s be honest everyone is so busy and our schedules rarely match up these days (perks of all of our grown up responsibilities….haha!) and of course I know I love the beach and traveling but those are planned things to do…. I’m so exciting right?? or maybe more like my kids describe my clothing style as simple, or maybe even boring 😂 So the whole routine aside what do I like to do??
With that said, over the last 12 years or so I’ve been really focused on my girls and still am, being a mom to the them is most important and there isn’t anything that I would change. Any free time for me comes in between whatever they have going on. It is hard not to plan an activity that doesn’t involve all of us or to set aside time away from them when they are home, it just doesn’t come easy for me. They on the other hand when we are home could play their fun apps and computer games all day without a blink of the eye as to what else we have going on unless I request that it’s time to turn it off. They also enjoy their activities during the week,excel in school, and enjoy playing or hanging out with their friends.We do have a lot of family time too but this change in our lives is challenging for me at the same time. I feel like at this part in their lives where they can handle more on their own and are growing their own interests it is opportunity for me to make some good changes in my own typical everyday routine.
I normally just do all the day to day stuff I have just always liked or have done and known since forever, I like to call this my comfort zone. I have matured a lot, gotten visibly older, I’ve grown more physically and mentally but not in a moved forward kind of way if that makes sense. I have always thought it would be fun to start a blog but never could find the time and put it on the back burner of things to do one day along with other ideas I have tossed around over the years but never making or feeling like I had the time. Procrastination at its finest too something I have always been very good at and now my kids are a little older and need me in a different way, are at a different stage in life, both being in school full time and having time with friends that doesn’t always involve me sticking around like I use to when play dates were a part of our time, so what is my excuse now?!?
I remembered I use to write all the time, I loved writing stories, reading quotes, finding quotes, and I use to write poems (they weren’t amazing by any means), but it was this part of me that I just turned off, I didn’t have time for anymore. Other than the gathering of quotes I occasionally collected on my pinterest board I stopped that creative and expressive side of me. I decide yes this is something I would like to do more of and now I have that time! As I begin to write and think of all that I want to write about it is exciting, so many ideas and thoughts popping up throughout the day. It’s like the switch turned back on and I am embracing it. It’s nice to have something apart from the normal routine of things and allows me to express myself too.
As I spend time writing this I have come across some other articles that would describe this as self care, which most of you know is considered as time set aside to take care of yourself and do something that will make you feel and be a better person. Over the years my main self care priority has been setting some hours aside during the week for some gym workouts and taking care of my overall health but really never ventured further than that, what I have set to do has always felt like enough. I usually continue on in my familiar safe routine of things and never make a change, but now it’s time I can move forward some more. Along with spending more time to write I am holding myself more accountable in the gym, trying and pushing myself harder and this time not stopping and letting excuses ruin my progress, I want to see what happens when I don’t give up or stay in my comfort zone. It’s not an easy task by any means but trying is better than continuing to wonder “what if” anymore.
This brings me to an example from my life that relates to the quote at the top of this page, what is now a couple years ago when my youngest had started school and I had a couple hours during the day, that I decided to use the time to take a couple college classes to finish up my associates degree. The time was right and what was I waiting for?! and sure enough those months felt long and it was hard but time passed, the classes were great and it helped finish my associates degree. I could still be wondering if I should go back if I never did, but I feel more accomplished that I finished what I had wanted to for years, its finding and making time for what you feel is important at the time. Of course everyone’s situation is different and you have to do what is best for your life, but use your time wisely, its easy to just let it pass you by. This is something I myself need to remember more too, after all life gets busy for me and I forget what I have and can accomplish.
So I will use this bit of extra time when I get it to reflect, write and do something that I almost forgot I love to do. I see this and want to use this as reminder to those that may not feel you have time for yourself right now, that it will come, even if it doesn’t feel like it, but also try to find something just for you in the meantime. Find that little bit of time for yourself, you may not be able to do all the things you remember before becoming a parent or taking on a career or both, even if it is five minutes during the day, whatever you can get. You have to have some time for you whether it’s a small hobby, reading a book, a group, or gym you can be a part of. Over the years I have gone from barely having minutes to myself that then turned into hours and now that time has grown even more and here I sit having time to write and type, it definitely hasn’t sunk in all the way but it’s growing on me!
As my kids grow and they are becoming more independent it does make me feel a little sad. I do realize this is my job as a mom, and as a parent for them to feel comfortable doing more own their own, learning, growing and finding what interests them. I need to remember that not only am I their mom but an example of an adult that needs to teach them to keep doing and moving forward, that we always keep growing no matter how old and it’s never to late to try or do something new. So find the thing that sparks your interest and find a little time out of the day or week to do something you enjoy, see where it takes you!💖
***How will you make time for yourself??
***What makes you a better person??
***What is your favorite thing to do for yourself that makes you feel better?? Reading, Writing, Exercising, Getting pampered, Talking to a friend, Taking a walk etc… etc…??